Saturday night, 23.10pm. I should be out mingling, giving the opportunity to a lucky lady to get in touch with my inner soul for the night. Instead I’m on the sofa, writing this post. Something is wrong.
What’s wrong is that I managed to strain my neck from doing pullups again. And instead of dealing with the pain, I thought I’d take Ibuprofen immediately this time. No good to let it ruin my Saturday, is it? Especially with the sun out.
What I had forgotten is that Ibuprofen sometimes makes me drowsy.
Sure enough, a bit later I’m sitting at the café I usually go to on Saturday afternoons to do some reading and I’m feeling sluggish. Same as I’m out strolling and looking for some daygame action. So I end up only doing the grocery shopping for the week.
I hoped that after getting home and eating I would take a nap or something so that I’d be ready for tonight, but nope. I’m sorry lucky lady, it seems it’s just not your lucky night tonight.
Last Friday I had another home date. This time it was an older woman who I had met some time ago on the dancing floor at a bar. I’ve written before how I think everyone who’s into nightlife and game should at least learn to feel comfortable on the dance floor. I was never into clubbing in my university years, possibly due to my group of friends. But since I changed country and social circle, I started going to clubs more. Going to clubs and not dancing is like going to the beach and not taking a dive. Sure there are things to do at the beach, but you’ll get hot and bored (pun intended).
I went to that woman’s place with a bottle of wine and a long disclaimer from her that I should not expect sex because of her complicated life. I’m not sure why I decided to go to be honest. In any case, what I like about that woman, except for her obviously good taste in men, is that she can take a tease. The banter is always enjoyable, she’s smart and pretty hot for her age (mid 40s I guess, didn’t ask).
The date was as good as a sexless date can be. Now I know women say things just to say them very often. Shit tests exist to weed out the weak guys and all that. Just as I know that it’s not impossible that “one thing leads to another” and suddenly we’re playing “just the tip, just for a little bit…just to see how it feels”. But since I’ve gotten to know that woman a bit more, and I know of some special circumstances in her life, I was convinced that she would put up a wall for me. So instead of banging my head against it, I decided to play it cool. I was also really, really tired. Seems like I was carrying some weight from this past work week. In short, the whole time we were playing catch up, she was learning about me and I was finding out about her complicated life. Once more, the complication was self inflicted. No game of fate or anything, just people not being strong enough to make decisions. I am being a bit judgemental, and I will be towards myself too if I ever end up like that.
Spring time, street time
In other news, sun is here and I’ve started doing some daygame. It can still get ball-biting cold but on a good sunny day there’s plenty of people out and as long as you’re not in the shade you should be able to do some approaches on the street or at the park. The latter ones are my favorite.
Last weekend I got 4/4 numbers from approaching during the day or evening. No, I’m not a fan of spam approaching. And lately I have found that I don’t feel the urge to approach if I don’t get excited enough when I see the girl. It’s like my mind is filtering out women automatically. Or maybe I’m only making excuses for myself.
In any case, it was good to see that my closing works but they were not really solid closes. In one case the girl was literally writing her number on my phone as I was holding it and she was stepping on the bus. That was kind of funny.
3/4 did not respond at all. One responded a couple of days later and we did have a short chat. She has disappeared, but I’m gonna re-initiate. I don’t expect much of course. From my experience, if something is going to happen then it is going to happen quickly. There has been a small percentage of women who became curious enough to go out with me long after I met them, but it’s negligible.
To be honest, daygame is more about the thrill and the skill than the result. If we compare effort and time, night and online are way better. But I’ll save the analysis for another time.
Getting technical: I want to spice things up
Creating leads has not been a big problem for me lately. Either from day or night, I get digits.
My main sticking point most of the time is spicing the conversation up. I often end up in the comfort area where I stay too long. I need to be polarizing more, teasing and creating something more memorable.
Now, Game will be comfort-heavy most of the time. And the good thing is that I’m good at that part. From a “technical” point of view, I do well with teasing and using innuendos when I know a girl likes me. But I’m holding back when I run into girls that are more neutral.
Sometimes comfort alone is enough, especially when you’re talking to a girl who is more shy. Then you have those that you don’t have a common sense of humor with and there the references or subtleties might get lost in translation.
To avoid paralysis by analysis, let’s just say that being a bit more forward when I get the urge to stay in comfort will not hurt me.
Time for bed.